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Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it serves as a reminder that when something unexpected happens, it’s often better just to laugh about it.

Here is the link to the podcast.

Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it serves as a reminder that when something unexpected happens, it’s often better just to laugh about it.

I was on a video call with someone that I was advising, and we were talking through some of her work so that I could help her with some direction and changes that needed to be made. It is key to point out that it was a video call. As I was discussing some of the issues with her, from out of nowhere, a little hand slowly came from behind me, reached around my face, and stuck a monkey sticker on my forehead, and then my granddaughter exclaimed, “You have a monkey!“

I had some options in that moment. I could have gotten angry and reacted from that anger. I could have gotten frustrated or annoyed, and expressed that to this little girl. Or I could have laughed, which is what I did (and so did the person on the video call) because it was innocent and funny. Of course, it did help that it was an adorable little three year-old and so, to some extent, I couldn’t help but laugh. But I think it would also be fairly easy to have a different reaction. The point is, I got to choose what my reaction was.

The same idea is very applicable to other circumstances that you navigate. Whether it is a meeting, an activity, or a project, you will likely experience obstacles and interruptions. They can be minor things that you can quickly move past, or they can cause a disruption that requires an adjustment. Either way, how you respond to it is totally within your control. You can get angry, you can get frustrated, or . . . you can laugh!

My dad would say, “You can be better or you can be bitter, but better is better than bitter.” How you react is up to you, but know that there is a consequence or impact based on your reaction. It may affect others, and it will definitely affect you. If you choose to laugh about it, you are much less likely to get frustrated and to let that frustration derail the progress that you are making. Instead, see the interruption as either a lesson that can be learned or a story that can be told, which turns it into something that brings value.

That’s the lesson on leadership from this little thing in life, from my granddaughter placing a monkey sticker on my forehead in the middle of a video meeting. You will experience interruptions, complications, and challenges. You get to decide how you will respond to those. If you can choose to see it as something to laugh about and to learn from, you can be better, not bitter, and that will help you and others to handle it well, grow, and move forward.

Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it serves as a reminder that not everyone thinks the same way.

My daughter was sitting with my 6-year-old grandson trying to decide on something to watch on tv together, and she asked him what movie he wanted to watch. He paused for a minute, then he said that it was taking a minute for his brain to process the name of the movie he was thinking of, because the doors that the name was behind in his brain were closed, and so he would be able to think of it in a minute when the doors opened. Yes, those were actually the words he used, including the statement that his brain was processing the name. After a minute, he said that none of the locks worked on the door, but that he had finally picked the lock to open the door to get the name of the movie he wanted to watch, and told her what it was.

This made me think of time when my children were in elementary school, and I was having a difficult time helping my son with his homework. I had not had the same challenges with my daughter, so when I expressed my frustration to my wife, she said, “Well, Jeff, that’s because your daughter’s mind thinks in the same way your’s does, but your son’s does not.” So I tried a little experiment. I told them that I was going say a word, and I wanted them to tell me immediately what they saw in their heads. I said the word, “cow,” and my daughter then said that she saw the word “cow” in her mind (just like me), but my son proceeded to describe an entire visual scene of cow in a pasture behind a fence. In that moment, I finally understood that my son thought differently than I did, and so he needed a different approach, but he also brought different insight.

This is something that you also need to understand, that not everyone thinks the same way that you do. But that’s a good thing, and we need to accept that, and to see how that is a benefit to our leadership and to our relationships. I think of three important ways that others who think differently than you bring value and need your support:

  1. They think of different things. You don’t know everything, and as my dad would say to me, “The more you know, the more you know you don’t know.” Other people know different things than you do, so tapping into their knowledge increases the overall knowledge of your organization.
  2. They think in different ways. Because they think differently, they will look from a different angle and through a different lens. The result will be new ideas and different ways of doing things that can increase the overall effectiveness and value of your organization.
  3. They need a different approach. They need the freedom and the support to able to think they way they think. If you try to force them to think the way you think through things, you will lose the benefit of the different things they think of and the different ways they think about things.

That’s the lesson on leadership from this little thing in life, from hearing my grandson say out loud how he was processing information in his brain. Not everybody thinks the same way. Different brains process things differently, and because they do, they bring different ideas and perspectives. So when we try to force others to think in the same way that we think, it has a negative impact for them and for us. If you want better knowledge and greater effectiveness, accept and encourage others to think the way that they think, because not everyone thinks the same way.

Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it serves as a reminder that you need to be prepared for the moments when you need to take charge.

On a beautiful Sunday morning, we were walking into church. As we were making our way down the sidewalk and approaching the stairs to the entrance, my 3-year-old granddaughter suddenly and forcefully told my grandson where he needed to step, took my daughter’s Bible and told me to carry it, took my daughter’s hand, and said, “Now we’re ready, let’s go!” I watched this happen and jokingly commented, “Well, somebody has to take charge!”

This reminded me of an experience I had when I was in high school. It was between my junior and senior year, and I was attending a week at a summer camp in a different state and didn’t know a single other person there. I am by nature an introvert, and I struggled with confidence at that time in my life, so I was doing my best to stay in the background. As the week began, the campers were divided into two teams for a week of activities and competitions. My team gathered to prepare for the first activity, and there seemed to be only confusion. Did I mention that I was also very competitive? I wanted to win, but all I could see was disorder, so finally, I stood up, got everybody’s attention, and started directing a plan. At the end of the week, my team had won, and the staff selected me as the camper of the week. If they only knew how much of a reluctant leader I was! But when the need was pressing and no one was leading, I took charge.

Often it seems like leaders are dominant personalities, who naturally seem to take charge. Those dominant leaders need to be sure to consider and involve others when they take charge. Less frequently, there are leaders who seem to be more reserved and introverted, which is my tendency, but that doesn’t negate or remove the necessity of taking charge when it is needed. Regardless of the type of leader you are, there is a Bible verse that has been significant in my life that underscores the prerequisite to taking charge. Ezra 7:10 says, “For Ezra had prepared his heart to seek the Law of the Lord, and to do it, and to teach statutes and ordinances in Israel.” Before you can be ready to take charge, you first have to prepare your heart, which involves two things:

  1. Cultivate the right person inside, by developing your character and integrity. Even more importantly, if you are a follower of Jesus Christ, learn to know God personally and intimately and align your inner person to Him.
  2. Exhibit the right person outside, by conducting yourself with external behavior that reflects the internal character you have been developing. Live outwardly in a way that matches who you are internally.

That’s the lesson on leadership from this little thing in life, from watching my granddaughter take charge of the situation as we were walking into church. No matter what kind of leader you are, you need to be prepared and ready to take charge when it is needed. That begins by developing your character on the inside, and then by living and acting with integrity on the outside. Without ignoring other leadership and organizational skills that are required to lead well in a circumstance that requires it, if you have done those things, you will be ready. It may be easy for you or it may be hard for you, but either way, you have been personally prepared and you are ready to take charge.

Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it serves as a reminder that you don’t see everything.

Here is the link to the podcast.

Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it serves as a reminder that you don’t see everything.

I thought about this when I was reflecting on my past experience as an educator. I recall one particular experience in my first year as a teacher when I was standing in the hallway having a face-to-face conversation with a student. I don’t remember what we were talking about, but I do remember the satisfaction of feeling like I was connecting with students. Then, a principal walked past us, stopped, looked at the student, and kindly told him to spit out his gum. The school had “no-gum” policy (because who wants to put their hand under a desk and stick their fingers unto someone else’s used gum), and yet I was looking directly into the face of student and I hadn’t even noticed that he had gum in his mouth.

Although the principal was gracious about it, as a new teacher I was mortified. Something that I was supposed to handle was happening right in front of me, and I didn’t even see it. I know that this was likely not the first time it was true in my job (or in my life in general), but I think it was the first time I realized that I could miss things, sometime obvious things and sometimes important things, and not even know it. Now, it would be fair to say that with experience I got better at seeing things I needed to see as a teacher, but in part that was because I did a better job of focusing on those things . . . and in the process would miss other things that were not part of my focus. No matter how much I improved at seeing some things, I still didn’t see everything.

This is also going to be true for you. I don’t know if you are humble enough to accept it, but regardless, it is still the case, because your brain has certain tendencies. Simon and Chabris demonstrated this in a research experiment involving a basketball, a focused task, and a man in a gorilla suit (if you’re interested, search for Simon and Chabris’s 1999 study, “Gorillas in Our Midst”). The study showed that conscious perception requires our intentional attention because we tend to see what we are looking for, but often see only what we are looking for, and we tend to not see what we are not looking for. Think about the last time you looked everywhere for something you had misplaced, only to find it right in front of you. In your mind, you remembered it looking a little different, or in a specific place, so unconsciously that’s what you were looking for, and therefore didn’t notice when it was in an obvious place where you had already looked.

Because that is the tendency of your brain, it is important that you not be too quick to assume that you have seen everything and then to jump to conclusions. Proverbs 18:13 tells us, “He answers a matter before he hears it, it is folly and shame to him.” One of my counseling professors shared that verse with my class and encouraged us to keep it in front of us when we were listening to patients. And for years as an educator, I kept it on my desk as a reminder when I was listening to discipline situations involving students. It’s because you don’t see everything that you need to make sure you are gathering all the information before you respond.

And that’s the lesson on leadership from this little thing in life, from a recollection of not seeing that a student was chewing gum right in front of my face. You don’t see everything. Partly that is because you can’t focus on everything at once, so you tend to pay attention to what you want to see, and to not see what you are not looking for. For that reason, you need to be careful to hear and receive the observations and information of others, and to not jump to conclusions before you get it. Don’t make decisions or react with your response before you have all the information, because remember, you don’t see everything.

Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it teaches us that you still have to take care of the little things, even if they are annoying.

Here is the link to the podcast.

Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it teaches us that you still have to take care of the little things, even if they are annoying.

I was reminded of this on a day when I was running errands and going to appointments, and trying to schedule other appointments in the process. I was trying to make good use of my time by making phone calls while I was waiting on something else. It happened to be on Good Friday, just before Easter, and the places that I called kept going to voicemail with messages that said that they were closed for Good Friday. Even though I understood why they were closed, it was a little frustrating, because they were still things that I needed to get done. Because they still needed to get done, I couldn’t just forget about them, and had to keep them on my list to take care of on a different day. And that was annoying.

I think that happens frequently with many of the peripheral things that we try to do. They are not the things that are the primary focus of the day, but they are still things that need to get done. Usually they are little things, and often there is more than one that needs to be taken care of. In that way, they can feel like annoyances. You know, things that we have to do because it’s necessary to do them, but we wish we didn’t have to take the time to do them because we feel like there are more important things we need to do with our time. Then, something happens that makes it even a little more difficult to do that little thing than what we had planned. We get frustrated, but that doesn’t change the fact that it is still something that needs to be taken care of. That’s what I was experiencing in that moment.

After I got past the initial frustration, I thought about some of the things that this experience could teach me. You may think of more, and you are welcome to share those with me, but these are the three that I immediately came to my mind.

  1. Take care of the little things, even if it’s annoying. It reminds me of the parable of the talents that Jesus told when he made the point that he who is faithful in little will be faithful in much. It reveals the reality that how you handle little things is generally a reflection of how you will handle big things. I’m also reminded of the verse in Song of Solomon 2:15 that, as an analogy, says the little foxes ruin the vineyard. So, not only will doing the little things be an indication of how you handle bigger things, not doing them will have a negative effect in the long run.
  2. Know that there will be hiccups. Often things don’t go exactly according to plan. Similar to the way that Jeff Goldblum‘s character described chaos theory in the original Jurassic Park movie when he dropped a water droplet on his knuckle to illustrate that tiny variations will cause changes in what happens next, expect that there will be unexpected things that have an impact on what you are trying to do.
  3. Choose how you respond, and take care of those little things anyway. You may not have control over external factors that cause hiccups, but you do have control over how you respond. Choose to see these things as challenges to be managed rather than problems that are in your way. You can’t always avoid the little difficulties, so don’t let them derail you.

That’s the lesson on leadership from this little thing in life, from navigating the little annoyances on a day when I was taking care of errands. Along with those things that may be your primary focus or task, there are lots of little things that need to be addressed, resolved, or managed. Expect them to be things that cause frustration (sometimes, at least), and choose how you respond, knowing that how you do is a reflection of how you will handle the big things, and that when you don’t, you are creating bigger problems. So, even if they are annoying, take care of the little things.

Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it teaches us that there is often more to what you see than what you see.

Here is the link to the podcast.

Life is full of examples that teach us lessons. That’s why stories and illustrations make learning so much more effective. When a story can be used to illustrate or demonstrate a valuable lesson, the story makes it much more understandable, relatable, and memorable. With that in mind, I want to take some time to do just that – share examples of circumstances and stories experienced in everyday life which illustrate leadership lessons that we can learn and apply. This is one of those examples, and it teaches us that there is often more to what you see than what you see.

I was driving to a neighboring town for some work that needed to be done on my truck. I live near the edge of the county, and the place I needed to get to was not far across the county line, so this errand took me into a different county than one that I live in. As I was driving towards my destination, I saw the sign on the side of the road that announced that I was now entering the next county. The difference was noticeable, because almost immediately the road surface became rougher, with some potholes and a well-worn surface. To be fair, the county that I live in had just resurfaced the road, and it had been quite rough before they had done that. But now, the difference was obvious. It was the same road, but the appearance, quality, and drivability changed when I crossed over from one county into another.

This made me think about other things that were the same, but then were presented, provided, or maintained differently. For example, sometimes when I’ve searched for something on Amazon, I have seen the exact same item selling for different prices from different vendors. I have seen cars listed for sale that were the same make, model, and year, but with noticeably different appearance and wear. I have gone to a department store to see an item of furniture or clothing selling for a higher (or lower) price than the same item at another department store (and it’s because this is true that some stores will offer to price match the price of something that another store has listed). I’ve witnessed prices rise, sometimes significantly, and then lower again in relation to circumstance and demand (do you remember the fluctuation in egg prices during the year of COVID?).

What do all of these things indicate? They point out that there is usually more to something than than what it appears to be in the surface. Eggs are eggs, but sometimes eggs are more valuable at one time than they are at other times. Two cars that are the same are affected by how they are maintained. The same item sold from different places will be affected by hidden costs of service and administrative factors. Each of those is affected by timing, priority, and resources. And that’s helps to explain why the same road that I was driving on in one county had a different feel in another county.

Now apply this concept to your leadership and your organization. You may offer a service or a product, but there is more to what you offer than simply the service or the product. It is for that reason that you need to be aware of the “more” that is there. If you are not, it will have a negative effect, not just on what other people see, but what they experience. You may be aware of others factors than what I list here, but you can at least start with these four things.

  1. Reputation. Your character and your conduct, both personally and organizationally, produce a reputation, and once that reputation is in place, it is very difficult to change. Be aware of your reputation, and get in front of things that could damage it.
  2. Hidden costs. There are often unexpected and unseen factors that impact what you are doing and how you are doing it. Knowing that allows you to plan for those kinds of contingencies. I had an uncle who was a building contractor, and he always added vandalism expenses to his costs, because experience had taught him that he was likely to experience it on a building project.
  3. Maintenance. Everything experiences wear from use and friction over time. Make sure that you are doing things necessary to maintain whatever needs to be maintained. There is effort and cost to keeping things maintained, so you need to account for it.
  4. Need. Demand almost always plays a role in the value of something. Pay attention to what people need, so that you can be aware of the ways in which you can meet those needs, and show how you are doing so.

That’s the lesson on leadership from this little thing in life, from noticing the change in the surface of the road as I drove from one county into another. There are things that you don’t see that eventually have an impact on what you do see. The reality is that what people see is also going to be affected by what they experience, and what they experience is often affected by what they don’t see. This requires you to cultivate a level of awareness and discernment, so that you can see what is not obvious or visible, what is hidden but necessary or uncontrollable, and can be intentional about how you navigate those things. Learn to see beyond and beneath what you see on the surface, because there is more to see than what you see.